Forgiveness

What do you do when old feelings of resentment and anger resurface? When you thought you had forgiven someone of something a long time ago but something you saw happened to reignite the fire of anger?

From 4 years old till almost 11 years old, I was in a 3 child, single mother home. Mom worked hard to bring home the necessities. During those years, when mom had to work, I stayed other family. One particular family member would call me by my middle name and was the only one I would answer to when called by that name.

I loved him and thought the world of him. And then I found out some things. Things that I won't post on this blog, or likely anywhere. My respect for him dropped like a hot rock. I no longer wanted to have much to do with him. And once a certain event happened, he didn't really want to have much to do with us either.

For years I've kept the memory of being called by my middle name buried. I've almost resented my middle name for years. But this is where the power of choice comes in. I have to choose to let go of the past and forgive. I have to let go of the bad memories and attachments that have accompanied my middle name.

Forgiveness doesn't always happen immediately when practiced between sinful humans. In fact, we can't do it without God's help. It's a theme all throughout the Bible. When we genuinely repent, God forgives us and throws the memory away. It's as if we never did it in His mind. And having received this gift, shouldn't we pass it along to others?

Matthew 18:21-35 is the parable of the unforgiving servant. The lesson of this story is that we must pass on the gift that God has so graciously given us. If we don't forgive, God can't bless us. If we don't forgive, it WILL have a physical effect on our physical person. People have been known to have ulcers from holding on to anger. Some may even have a heart attack.

We have to let it go for our own sake as much as for the offender's sake. If Jesus, who did not deserve punishment in any way, died on the cross and forgave a criminal who justly deserved his sentence, then we have no right to refuse that gift to others.

I know it may take a while to forgive and not think about it again. And God will help me to get there. "I can do all things through Christ who gives me strength." Philippians 4:13. Meanwhile, let's all give the gift of Jesus love and forgiveness to those who need it. Sure, it may take some time. But ultimately, we will be better for it and most importantly, closer to Jesus.